The Giraffe Telephone Law

It is illegal to tie your giraffe to a telephone pole.

You know that this one is there only in response to one dude who owned a giraffe and the shopowner who's store unfortunately lived right behind a telephone pole. I like to think that the giraffe owner's name is Jerry and that the conversation went something like this:

SHOPOWNER: Jerry! For the last time, don't tie that fucking giraffe to that telephone pole.

JERRY: Yo, it's a free country asshole... I can tie this giraffe anywhere I want!

SO: Not in front of my store!

JERRY: Oh yeah? What are you gonna do about it?

SO: (reaching for telephone book to look up the Vermont State Court) Oh, you'll see asshole... you'll see.